Iveyrock

Ian invited me out to catch bats with him tonight. His sister was sleeping, but he took a nap this afternoon. Daddy was inside cleaning up the kitchen, and it was just the two of us outside, catching bats.

He started off asking, “do we have any bat catchers in this house?” He found a cardboard box that he thought might work. My job was to stand by the box, waiting to put in any bats that we might catch. His job was to stand on the picnic table with the telescope from the swing set, watching the bats go past.

The Swing Set is officially finished.

Micah had his first swing ride, with Ian and Chava begging to swing him. This could be an excellent summer for mommy.

Since I spent months of my life researching and obsessing over swing sets, I’m going to put in some logistics. Maybe it will help someone else is spending their nights searching for swing set reviews, like I did.

The Swing Set is a Cedarworks Play-A-Round Trading Post. The company was excellent to work with (they even offered some suggestions for my bee phobia). The set seems pretty sturdy. Ray feels like the big platform could be a little stronger, but it is fine for the kids. The instructions were clear and easy to follow. The set comes with a lot of the pieces already assembled, so that saves a lot of time.

We ordered an extra safety fence, since the original design has an opening for access to the fireman’s pole and knotted rope. It looks really awkward in the pictures, and I didn’t think it would be safe for Chava to try to reach around to the pole. Now that I’ve seen it assembled, I am very glad we have that fence there. I’m not sure why they designed it like that, but I can’t imagine it working well.

It took two days to put together, with about fifteen minutes on the third day to finish the fireman’s pole. We didn’t rush, and finished at about 3:00 each day. Ray did a lot of the main structure himself, but there are parts where you really need a second person to help lift. Ray and Ryan used a cordless drill; and I can’t imagine how long it would have taken without those. I would consider them a necessity. There are more pictures on Flickr, if anyone is interested in the assembly process

All in all, I’m pretty pleased with the set. It doesn’t take up as much of the yard as I was afraid it would, even with the safety parameter. I am glad we went with a slightly bigger set; Chava is scampering right up the ladders that I thought might be tricky for her. The kids have been playing on it constantly, depsite the heat.

The second day was a little more hectic. We were expecting the lawn guy to come in the afternoon, and we planned to go someplace in the evening. So there was a little more pressure to get things done.

Uncle Ryan came to help out, which we appreciate. Especially since the weather was again up to 100 degrees. The kids got to help test the accessories as they went on.

The one thing Ian has been asking for from the beginning is a telescope on his swing set. He got to climb it up for daddy to attach.

The saftey rails, ramps, and accessories are all attached. The only thing left to do is dig a hole for the fireman’s pole.

At the end of Day Two:

The first day went fairly well. It was the hottest day we’ve had yet, with a high of 102. Ian kept saying, “Why are we doing this in the summer? We should have done it in late spring…”.

We made it through the day with only a couple of blisters and ant bites. The actual construction went really smoothly.

The kids really had no concept of what we were doing. We had talked to them about it for a couple of weeks, and shown them pictures of what the swing set will look like. When we got the boxes, I could tell that Ian didn’t really understand any of it. Even as we started to put it up, they were pretty unclear on the whole thing.

On the other hand, the kids worked hard.

I was impressed by how much they put into this project, especially since they weren’t really sure what the whole thing was all about. They worked right alongside Ray for most of the day.

By the end of the day, Ray had the main structure up. Next step: attaching the ramps and accessories. Uncle Ryan is coming to help with Day Two. I’m hoping it goes as well as the first day.

At the end of Day One:

A couple of weeks ago, I happened to come across this post on the Simplekids website. I filed it away as a good idea for getting us out of a downward spiral – which obligingly started up about ten minutes after I saw the idea. When I could see that things where going to keep going downhill, I said, “Hey, I know what’s wrong! You don’t have any faces on your feet! Let me fix that for you!” They thought it was great, especially since I hadn’t yet  lifted the ban on body art. It got us right out of our funk, and they kids loved telling Daddy about it that night.

I thought it was fun, but didn’t think too much more about it. However, it’s apparently taken on a life of it’s own. We’ve done it two more times, and each time it’s helped. The thing that is really neat, though, is that it’s been Ian’s idea. Both times he was getting more and more ’stuck’. Today he and Chava were bickering, and he was upset. I was thinking of ways to end the dynamic, all of which involved separating the kids. I was just about to announce an early quiet time, when Ian asked “Can I have faces?”

It’s really fun to see him coming up with positive ways to get us all unstuck and moving on with our day. I am proud of him for wanting to work his way out of his mood, and for coming up with an idea to do it.

Today the kids requested faces on their faces as well. Then they wanted a face on MY face. They thought it was hilarous. I forgot about it, until I’d talked to a couple of my neighbors with green marker all over my face.

Yesterday we got two things we were anxiously awaiting…

more yarn, for more soakers

and our swingset

Besides the actual focus on NOT cleaning, I think the other reason this schedule is working well is how specific it is. I’ve read different methods of keeping a home clean, and none of them really made sense for the way we actually use our house, or our priorities. Not to mention, I really can’t follow somebody else’s method, and do things just because they say so. So I put a lot of thought into making a schedule that actually fits my needs.

I may have gotten a bit carried away, in fact. Ray came home one night to find me sitting in the middle of a bunch of paper, with lots of circles and scribbles all over them. They included questions like, “what are my ultimate goals for my family?” Sheets of paper covered with every thing that must be done each day, each week, each month, and each year; and a breakdown of what each job entails. And details about what each person in the family needs to be healthy and functioning.

The end result of all this is a schedule that so far, really works for my family. One my favorites things about it is the way I rotate our chores. That means that I will not have a perfectly clean house at any given point in time – which helps me to not switch into crazy-mode trying to keep the house perfect. I have just enough variety through the day to keep it interesting and challenging, and enough stability that I know exactly what needs to be done each day to keep the house running smoothly. If I miss a day, I have a couple of built in times that I can catch back up.

Because I know what I need to do when, I don’t need to spend my mental energy thinking about it, instead of living life with my kids. I am able to be very flexible, because I know exactly what I am not doing, and exactly when I will get to it again. I know exactly when I am doing each chore, so I don’t spend the whole day dreading it, and trying to figure out a way to fit it in. And, perhaps most surprising to me, my house is reasonably clean. I would be happy to have company drop by at any given time… as long as they don’t look in the den.

I love my housekeeping schedule. Really, I do. I know that some of the people who know me well might find that a little hard to believe (hi mom!). But I created this schedule a couple of months ago, and so far it is working.

I really think that one of the main reasons it is working for me is this: the goal of the schedule is to keep me from cleaning my house. See? Easy-peasy.

When I get into housecleaning mode, it kicks my anxiety into high gear. After Chava was born I tried to keep everythink picked up and clean as I went, because I wasn’t sure when I was going to be able to get to it again. While that works well for many people, that is exactly the wrong approach for me. I kept trying to do ‘one more thing’ until suddenly it was 2:00 and I hadn’t eaten lunch.

So a big goal of my schedule is to have a specific time to do the things that need done, and large chunks of time when I am not supposed to be doing anything. When I know there is a time to pick up toys, I don’t spend all day thinking about how I need to do it. I also don’t spend my time obsessing about the toys my kids get out after we’ve just cleaned, because I know exactly when they will get picked up again. I get to spend my time and mental energy focusing on just being with the kids – which is my main goal in life, right now.

I told them to stop putting mulch and sand in the water. I told them to find something else in the yard to use instead.

I am not going to write a whole blog post about my horrible, no good swimming lessons experience. Instead, I am going to write out the positive things about how the day went. Cause that’s what this blog is about, right? Of course right.

1. My kids were wonderful, the entire time. There was a whole lot of craziness about where we were supposed to be and what we were allowed to do. The kids did exactly what I told them to do, when I told them to do it. I am especially proud of Chava, who had to sit and watch her brother do swimming lessons, when she had been promised that she would get to swim.

2. Because my house is under control, walking in the door felt relaxing. I was able to come right in, make the kids lunch, and settle in without feeling overwhelmed.

3. Last year at this time, I would have been overwhelmed. I got through the whole miserable thing without loosing my own ability to handle the situation. I spoke to the staff at the Y politely, but I let them know that I was upset. It hasn’t ruined the rest of my day. I am still able to get done what I need to do, and have fun with my kiddos.

4. I managed to get us all there, all changed, all changed back, and all into the car. I wound up trying to help three kids in the pool, and there were no near-death experiences. The kids got to swim in the end. Everybody survived.